I am just mentally exhausted and physically sick. I just am so tired of being alone… I just don’t know . I feel pathetic. I don’t need a boyfriend. I just need a guy friend to be there for me to cuddle with me and say everything will be okay. I hate not having a chance with any guy. I don’t see how I can be so repulsive and how I can just be nothing. This time of year I miss my grandma. She always had the right thing to say and the classy attitude to keep me positive and helpful. Ugh. I don’t wanna keep going.